A deeper kind of relaxation

When I think of relaxation, I realise how rare it truly is.. the kind where the mind grows quiet, the breath finds its own natural rhythm, and every muscle begins to soften without you trying. This kind of relaxation is not easy to reach, especially in these times when we are always pulled in so many directions at once.

I ask myself, when was the last time I felt it fully? The kind of relaxation where my jaw was free of clenching, my back was not carrying weight, my forehead was smooth and soft, and there was no effort left in me to hold on. In those moments, the mind becomes still, like the surface of a calm lake. There is no need to fix, no need to plan, no need to escape. Just being here, in the body, in the breath.

We often mistake distraction for rest. Scrolling on a phone, watching football, or binging a series on Netflix may feel like unwinding, but the nervous system is still busy. The eyes are alert, the mind is stimulated, emotions are pulled in different directions by whatever we are watching.

The body may be lying down, but inside there is no true settling. This is why after hours of “relaxing” in front of a screen, we can still feel tired, restless, or unsatisfied.

Relaxation is not a luxury. It is one of the most important things we can give to ourselves, because the body cannot heal or restore itself when it is caught in tension. Only when we sink into that deeper rest does the nervous system slow down, the heartbeat steady, the breath lengthen. This is the space where the body remembers balance, where stress can dissolve instead of staying trapped inside. Our health depends on these moments, yet we often forget to create them.

I have been noticing more in myself, especially over the past month when I offered myself more time to connect with my own body, that water helps me return to this space. When I close the bathroom door, dim the lights, and let the world fade outside, I find my own little cocoon. I step into the warm bath, moving slowly, touching my body gently, finding my own rhythm, and this tells every part of me that is ok to relax.

I also find relaxation in the physical connection with others, when I place my hands on someone’s skin and allow myself to follow the rhythm of their breath. There is a peace that arises there, as if our bodies create stillness together.

This is the essence of what I feel when I think of tantric massage. It is not only about pleasure but also about this quiet gift of deep relaxation. Touch can speak to the body in ways that words cannot. It can soften the edges of worry, remind the heart that it does not need to race, and guide the mind into presence. Touch teaches the body how to surrender, how to trust, how to let go.

So I come back to the same question: when was the last time you truly relaxed? When did you last feel yourself sinking so deeply into rest that the noise of the world disappeared, that you were simply here, breathing, alive, without tension pulling at you? These are the moments that restore us, that bring us home to ourselves.

Love,

Rosie x