Exploring erotic energy without release

If you choose to explore semen retention, it doesn’t mean you need to stop erotic exploration. In fact, in tantra, we speak of orgasmic states—not as a peak to chase, but as a way of being. It’s about learning how to stay in that erotic, alive energy without needing to let it spill out. To simply rest in it, to let it move through you, to let it feed you.

If you’ve read my previous blog, you’ll know that in Taoist tradition, the male body is seen as a vessel of powerful energy. Ejaculation isn’t considered bad—but it is seen as a release of vital life force, known as jing. The idea isn’t to stop ejaculation altogether, but to become more conscious about how, when, and why we release. To shift from automatic release to something more intentional.

And naturally, that brings up a very real and common question: Is it harmful for a man to get turned on and not ejaculate—especially if he hasn’t yet learned how to move that energy?

The simple answer is: it’s not harmful, but it can definitely feel uncomfortable. Arousal is strong and it builds in the body. And if we don’t know how to meet that energy with presence, it can feel frustrating. Some men notice tightness in the pelvis, mood swings, restlessness, or even temporary discomfort in the testicles—what people casually call “blue balls.” But these aren’t signs that something’s wrong—they’re the body asking for support.

And this is where Taoist practice can be so beautiful. It teaches us how to work with that energy instead of being overwhelmed by it. How to let it flow, soften, and expand, without needing to release it. How to stay with pleasure in a way that is nourishing.

Here are a few gentle practices you can try if you’re curious to explore this path.

Start with deep, soft belly breathing.

When arousal begins to rise, bring your breath into the lower belly. Let it expand the space around your pelvis. As you exhale, imagine the energy softening and spreading. This helps the body relax into sensation rather than clenching or rushing.

Bring your awareness to the perineum—the space between your testicles and anus.

This area often holds a lot of unconscious tension, especially during arousal. Try to soften it. Let the muscles release. This creates more space for the energy to move, and less pressure in the genitals.

Let yourself sigh.

Make a soft sound on the exhale. This might feel strange at first, especially if you’re not used to making sound when you’re alone. But sound helps energy move. It vibrates through the body, calming the nervous system and expanding pleasure.

Move your hips

Let your hips roll gently—small, circular movements or rocking back and forth. This doesn’t need to be erotic in appearance, but the movement helps awaken the pelvic floor and keeps energy flowing. Just like in dance or breathwork, the hips are a powerful gateway for emotional and sensual release.

Widen your attention to include your whole body.

Instead of staying focused only on your genitals, see if you can feel your hands, your spine, your chest, your feet. Arousal doesn’t need to stay in one place. It can move through the whole system, if you let it.

And if it starts to feel too intense, pause when needed. Place your hands on your chest or your belly. Breathe. Imagine the energy moving up your spine or towards your heart. You can even press your tongue gently to the roof of your mouth—an old Taoist trick to help guide energy upward.

Most of all, allow yourself to simply be in your erotic energy. Let go of the need to do anything with it. You don’t have to suppress it, you don’t have to finish it- you can just feel it and let it dance  through you, let it stay.

Tantric and Taoist traditions both teach us that pleasure doesn’t always need to lead to climax. It can be something we rest in. Something we expand into. Something we allow.

You don’t have to be perfect with the techniques and you don’t even have to do all of them. Just start by slowing down, breathing, listening to your body. Over time, you’ll notice your body responding. You’ll feel more in tune and you might start to realise that this erotic energy—when held with softness and awareness—can become something deeply alive, powerful, and sustaining.

Love,

Rosie x